I have had a lot of fun in my life just doing silly stuff. You know, when you hang around a bunch of hilarious people, ideas come to mind to entertain yourselves, and one time, I, just out of the blue, decided to read some palms. It was a joke, people, a joke!!
Okay, I will tell it as I heard it from a woman at the fair many, many years ago..she had a scarf on her head and big hoop earrings, so I knew she was for real..hahahaha..
She told me this: The trick to reading palms is that everyone has so much 
in common, you can’t go wrong if you stick to the middle ground and every day subject matter. You can’t say things like “Your Grandmother was a stripper” or “Your Grand dad did time during prohibition.” OR, “You fell down the stairs last Tuesday.” Those are facts. You have to say things like, “You had a bad day two weeks ago” or “You want to shop for some new things.” or “You are a sensitive person.” (Everyone likes to hear this.) You may also say, “You have had three or four jobs in your life. You left one of them because they didn’t treat you right.” Most of us have done that. So, I did not learn palm reading, I learned about keeping it general…………..
Now, here is what happened to me when I was faking the palm reading thing, just for the fun of it….(Hey, it IS entertaining, especially when someone has a few drinks under their belt!!)
Now, the Times Daily doesn’t always tell the straight facts, but they do publish a general picture of some of the things happening around here. They put in pictures and the people in the pictures always look guilty, even if they are not!! If it was about me, I would be criticizing every word of it, and probably clipping it out and pasting it in one of those expensive and trendy scrapbooks with the pretty little designs around it that I bought in a kit at Hobby Lobby.
But, I digress…..
I had read the paper a week before, and I knew a few things about this girl who approached me at a local hangout. She 
had heard that I was right, by golly!!! She begged for a palm reading. I recognized her right away, from the article in the newspaper, so I took her hand and said, “Wow, you have had a lot of bad things go on lately. You have been hanging with the wrong people. You have been dabbling in drugs and alcohol, and bad things are happening because of it. You also have been very good friends with a short, balding man who is married with children.”
She gave me “the look”, a cross between terror and “You are making this up.”
I continued my “reading”. I said, “This person is not good for you. This person has brought you a lot of heartache and will bring you more. He will cost you a lot of money and wasted time. He is selfish. You are following his program, not yours. I see you in a courtroom, being judged. You are way better than this. Don’t let him bring you down. You have a career that you may lose if you stick by his side.”
She jumped off her stool, jerked her hand back, and screamed, “You are a damn liar!!!!!” Then, like Elvis, she left the building. Unlike Elvis, she was crying!! I felt so bad!!
I don’t know whatever happened to this girl. I really didn’t know her. I just knew of her because of an article in a local paper.
I also don’t know who learned the best lesson that night. I learned how to truly fake someone off with “palm reading”, which I know nothing about, and that it can be a little scary to some. I learned that maybe I shouldn’t be talking like this to people. Maybe she learned that the things you do to yourself sometimes show on your face. Maybe she is doing well now. Maybe she got away from that scum sucking dog, and created a good life for herself, a life that doesn’t include him. Maybe she finally decided she had heard the truth, and fixed her problems. Maybe, today, she is proud of herself and all she has managed to accomplish. I hope so.
I haven’t faked a palm reading in many years. For one thing, my Momma caught on and told me it is a sin, and she better not catch me at it again… and you know, by that age, I listened to my Momma. Like most young people, I started listening to her when she got some sense…I was about 25 when she finally smartened up…(wink)
